The one where everyone cries (except Daddy)

Dawn of the Dead (aka Sleep walking Mama)

Sometime around 6:30am, my 13 month old princess was crying from her cot. I swayed downstairs rather clumsily while I tried to adjust my eyes to the morning light. I poured milk into a bottle and threw it into the microwave. I looked out the back window at the blinding sunshine and realised that it was going to be a gorgeous today. However, today is the first day of my period so, scratch that. I ran back upstairs while trying not to trip over the clothes on the stairs that I had moved from the kitchen during my cleaning efforts yesterday. At the top of the stairs, the immense pain that suddenly hit me was excruciating! What the F*@K!!!! I looked down to see my son’s Lego piece attached to the under side of my foot. Sweet Jesus. I did congratulate myself in my head though for not screaming in pain. It’s amazing how discreet you can be when sleeping children are involved!!

I ran inside my daughters room and gave her the bottle. I also took away the water bottle I had given her during the night which had turned upside down and soaked her. Lovely. I must have fallen back to sleep after giving it to her. I don’t even remember getting up!!!

10 More Minutes Please?

I went back to bed in bliss. Then at 8:30, everything started to wake up. I heard the dog barking, my baby banging some random object against her cot and my 5 year old daughter in the hallway. I went and brought my baby girl into our bed for a little playtime. My husband woke my son as they were going to a truck show. I had great plans to clean the house and put away clothes. It was now that I started to feel it, a headache setting in. And I felt nauseous as well. This always happens when I get my period.

My son went downstairs and made breakfast for himself and his sister which is great. He’s a great help. I went down and started feeding the baby as well while my husband had a shower. I told my son that he had to pack some things in a bag for the truck show which he started doing. Once he got one thing in his bag, he wandered around the house, chatting and playing with toys. I swear I had to tell him 20 times to keep packing his back. My headache was at the point of explosion by now.

As I changed my baby girl who had wee coming out of her legs at this stage, she started squirming and crying. She hates getting changed. I heard my other daughter asking me something but it didn’t register. I think she asked me again but I was so concentrated on the wee waterfall that I didn’t listen again. Then it registered. “Can I put on a princess dress Mammy?” Sure, sure you can. I put my baby girl back on the floor as my son came back in the room, bag complete.

“Come over here until I put sun cream on you”, I got the spray stuff in the shop the previous week. I started putting it on him and then went to put it on his face. By mistake, I sprayed it near his eyes and it got into them. Cue crying. My 7 year old even started drooling while he was crying. Oh my God the stress!! He stopped crying eventually and then went off with his dad.

My headache hit really hard then. My 2 daughters were in the hall way. The baby was holding onto my older daughter and she pushed her away. Cue baby crying and then my 5 year old crying as well. At this point I went to the bathroom and sat on the toilet, I put my head in my hands and my head felt like it was going to explode.

Breaking Point

Then I had a little cry. After 2 minutes of breathing, I came back out. I brought my baby girl upstairs while my daughter played in the kitchen. I put my baby down on the landing (stair gate closed) and lay on my bed. I needed a timeout, I needed a sleep. The only thing that was going to get me to function at all with a headache this bad was a nap. I wanted my own mother. I actually contemplated calling her to come down (she lives a 30 minute bus ride away). I felt like crap. I felt really ill.

As my daughters played, it was getting near nap time so I scooped up my daughter and put her in the cot with her bottle and went back to lay on the bed. After about 15 minutes, I realised that she wasn’t going to go to sleep. There was just no way. So I put her in the buggy, and being mother of the year and all, I switched on Peppa Pig and let her watch it as I went and lay down again. The headache was seriously pounding and I had moments where I thought I was going to throw up. She was content in front of the tv so I did manage a little shut eye, although not a nap, but it seemed to ease the pain and the painkillers were setting in.

Energy Release

I started cleaning up and gave the girls lunch. I felt worse again almost instantly and I knew that I had to take the girls for a walk to get the baby to sleep. So after we all (finally) got dressed, I put her in the buggy and we got ready to go. All set, door open, baby in buggy and I felt it. I ran to the bathroom and threw up…. lots.

Flushed the toilet, wiped my mouth, washed my hands.

“Lets go for our walk girls!” Because you don’t get a break from being a mother.

The joys of motherhood… it’s ok to almost break. Recognise that you need a break and a timeout sometimes. Closing the door for 1 minute is not a bad thing, we are all doing the best we can under very stressful circumstances.

Take Care

Reality Mammy x


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